Tuesday, March 8, 2011

SOLSC Day 8: To Whom it May Concern

Yes, I'm having a fit. I doubt you are in the line of fire, but watch out!

To my bookstore that offers "free express" shipping: don't tease me with an earlier arrival date than when my items (which I already paid for) will actually arrive. I know that in other places (such as civilization) you don't have to add another day for the horse and buggy to bring it out to your actual home, but I do. So stop it.

To the people who speculate about oil: just shut up. It's the same product at $1.00 as it is at $3.55, yet you feel the need to "fear" that something may happen at some unknown time and until then we better just directly link our bank accounts to you. It's unfair to those of us who already don't get paid what we're worth and have the fear of looming budget cuts.

To my mail carrier: CLOSE. THE. DOOR. ON. THE. MAILBOX. Case in point: during last week's deluge you left the mailbox wide open, ruining magazines that I pay money to receive every month. How would you like it if I poured a glass of water on something valuable of yours, thus basically destroying it, and walked away without a care? Yeah, I thought so.

To my (former) satellite company: could you please lower your rates so that I can watch television like a normal person again? Or better, devise a system where I can buy the 10 channels I actually watch at a per channel rate, and you can keep the channels I don't watch. Sounds like a plan to me.

To my favorite clothing store: could you please try to consistently size your items, namely shirts? It's a tough guessing game when you aren't sure what size, and it sucks when you guess wrong and you ordered online. Also, whose brilliant idea was it to fold the decal sides of a skirt together to ship it on a hot truck? Result: it stuck to itself, and lucky for you I'm smart enough to separate it without ruining it. Don't worry, I kept my receipt.

To the condescending & the sexist: no one wants to hear you spew your hatred, your "knowledge" or your otherwise snarky remarks that make you "superior." No really, no one does. We're all have our own sense of intelligence. So keep it to yourself. And furthermore, don't call me a girl. It's demeaning, because you really mean that you're a man and I'm inferior to you, which is incorrect on its own. I can (and regularly do) outwit people like you.

To the vast majority of people: stop using "gay" as a derogatory term, because if I wanted to insult someone I wouldn't call them "gay," I'd call them "redneck" or "ignorant" or "racist/sexist". So there. Your ignorance of the meaning of the word either means a) you've never seen a dictionary or b) you're not the best example in the world of good parenting or c) you need new friends who have a brain between their ears. Yeah, I went there.

Sigh. That felt good.


elsie said...

Sometimes a person just needs to let off a little steam. I hear that venting is good for the soul, so you should be in good shape. Hope tomorrow is better.

Stephanie McCabe said...

You go, girl!!